Monday, May 31, 2004

I get a big kick out of weather around here.  I left my house in a rainstorm, went to Gulf Shores, and there was nary a cloud to be seen.  I came back, and by the time I reached Robertsdale it was storming again.  Fabulous.
And it seems that trying to go to the beach is never uneventful.  This time, Emily and I ran into Bruno's to pick up some beer and munchies, and when I came back out to the parking lot, my door decided that it never wanted to shut again.  The latch had broken.  So, being the redneck and ingenious women that we are, we were able to close it using a bungee cord, and took our happy butts to the beach.  (heck, we thought about using duct tape, but the cords were cheaper...)
Hope all is well in everyone else's universe...ciao til later!

Sunday, May 30, 2004

So anyone who lives in the South has undoubtably heard the song "Redneck Woman."  You can't change the radio station without hearing's on every county, rock, pop and whatever station out there (except maybe TK101...).  And as I was sitting around this morning, and had the offers to
1.  go fishing
2. go dirt biking/ 4-wheeling/etc.
3. go hunting...?
I realized that perhaps I'm not too far away from the lyrics of the song.  So I'm posting the lyrics for all to enjoy, and "here's to all my sisters..."
Well, I ain't never been the Barbie doll type
No, I can't swig that sweet Champagne, I'd rather drink beer all night
In a tavern or in a honky tonk or on a four-wheel drive tailgate
I've got posters on my wall of Skynyrd, Kid and Strait
Some people look down on me, but I don't give a rip
I'll stand barefooted in my own front yard with a baby on my hip
'cause I'm a redneck woman
I ain't no high class broad
I'm just a product of my raising
I say, 'hey ya'll' and 'yee-haw'
And I keep my Christmas lights on
On my front porch all year long
And I know all the words to every Charlie Daniels song
So here's to all my sisters out there keeping it country
Let me get a big 'hell yeah' from the redneck girls like me, hell yeah
Victoria's Secret, well their stuff's real nice
But I can buy the same damn thing on a Wal-Mart shelf half price
And still look sexy, just as sexy as those models on TV
I don't need no designer tag to make my man want me
Well, you might think I'm trashy, a little too hardcore
But in my neck of the woods I'm just the girl next door
I'm a redneck woman
I ain't no high class broad
I'm just a product of my raising
I say, 'hey y'all' and 'yee-haw'
And I keep my Christmas lights on
On my front porch all year long
And I know all the words to every Tanya Tucker song
So here's to all my sisters out there keeping it country
Let me get a big 'hell yeah' from the redneck girls like me, hell yeah
I'm a redneck woman
I ain't no high class broad
I'm just a product of my raising
I say, 'hey y'all' and 'yee-haw'
And I keep my Christmas lights on
On my front porch all year long
And I know all the words to every ol' Bocephus song
So here's to all my sisters out there keeping it country
Let me get a big 'hell yeah' from the redneck girls like me, hell yeah
Hell yeah, hell yeah
Hell yeah
I said hell yeah!


Tuesday, May 25, 2004

I  E-bay.  Really.  I get a big kick out of ordering stuff from them. 
Living at home stresses me out.  Dealing with my lil sister and having no space of my own is really getting to me.
Hooray for scholarships!  Dr. S. called me today to tell me that I won mucho dinero to spend in London!!!!!! 
SO I'm reading Quicksand, which I was supposed to read last semester for Pitter-Patter. It's actually worth the time to read...Cas and Suze, take note

Monday, May 24, 2004

So it's been "back to the real world" for me this week.  I still want to bask in the glow of this weekend, but alas, work and responsibility beckons. 
I'm just kinda floating along this week though...I'm tired of living in my house, ready to get out and do something, can't wait for July 8th, and hate having to share a room with Amber.  It's so hard to go back to living at home after having a room at school for so long. 
I need to quit complaining.  But what better place to do it than here?

Saturday, May 22, 2004

I feel like I will be recovering from this weekend forever. 
My 21st birthday was, quite possibly, the most memorable I've ever had.  I got to party with all of my favorite people...all weekend.
Friday night, Emily, Anna and Tereasa took me out, and Adam (bless his heart) played designated driver for the Baldwin County girls.  I think he now understands what a "girl's night out" is really all about.  We went to Picklefish for dinner (gotta love it...)and Insomnia (yeah, it's a crappy club, but it was ladies night, so no cover, and $1 sex on the beach).  Tereasa had gotten this...glowy St. Louis, and Anna had gotten me a birthday shot glass necklace, so it didn't take long before I was g-o-n-e.  But whatever- we had a great time.  Have you hugged your kayak today?  (Don't ask).  Needless to say, Adam and Emily had to help me home, b/c I would have been content to never move again.
Saturday...I don't know if I can adequately describe Saturday.  It was my 21st fiesta, and ALL of my fave people were in the same place.  Shout outs to all of my fellow xanga users!  We danced, swam, skiied, kneeboarded, ate (we had enough food to feed a small country!), drank, chatted, and ultimately had a great time.  I have a nasty little bruise from falling off the deck (ha. ha. ha.  Next time, the chair shouldn't be that close to the edge...), have acquired 6 new watches and 4 new pairs of sunglasses (yes Amy, I found your watch).  And watching my Spring Hill friends meet my Fairhope friends, and both sets of those friends meet my river was interesting, to say the least. 
I love everyone, and thanks so much to everyone who helped make my "golden birthday (21 on the 21st of May!!) extra special.  And kudos to those of you who understand and appreciate my addiction to Care Bears!
I'll have some pics up later today, and more up in the next few days.  If you have some, please send them to me!

I'm recovering from strep throat.
Party is still on.  No chance in me not having it.  I only have to take antibiotics for 3 days, so it's not even that bad.  I feel somewhat better already- still a little weak, but I'm back at work today.
Amber graduated on Tues. Emily and I, as is our tradition, went to the stadium for the graduation/reunion/fashion show. I swear, these people make it a point to put on their most expensive outfits to wear to a football stadium.  Not to mention, it started raining half-way through...fabulous.  It was actually really funny to watch.  These women (and girls, I should add) in their most expensive clothes...getting soaked.  Since when did graduation become an all-out contest for who can show the most "bling-bling"?  (Oh yeah...when I moved to Fairhope....)
Blah.  I don't feel like writing.  I'll think of something clever and write later...

I found this really amusing.  Thanks to JD, I laughed today...What's your Mormon name?  I'm Calina Caroldean.  I think I'm gonna start calling myself that from now on...

Friday, May 21, 2004


Wednesday, May 19, 2004

Sleepless nights suck.  Oy.  Watching the clock tick forward minute after god-forsaken minute is not fun. 

I'm at work again, but leaving to go home in a few.  My lil sis graduates from high school tomorrow...scary thought.  Emily and I will be on our way to yet another FHS graduation.  At this rate, we'll end up having a reason to go to every single one until our 10 year reunion. 
I want to make some fun CD's for this weekend, but I'm drawing a blank as to what to put on them.  Any suggestions?

Sunday, May 16, 2004

Ahhh...the beach.   I love it.  I love the sand, the water, swimming in the Gulf, sandcastles...all of it.  I wouldn't live somewhere that I couldn't go to the beach for the afternoon.  Spent the afternoon at the Gulf with Adam, and he's as big (or bigger??) a far of the sand and sun as I am...
I have a lot on my mind lately.  Adam asked me to go to Houston to pick up his daughter in a few weeks.  I have very mixed emotions regarding said favor.  I want to..for him...but at the same time, I'm not sure that I'm ready for that.  I don't know.  His ex has always hated me, probably because she always knew that I was forever entwined with Adam's life...have been since we were 12.  But I know what it feels like to know that even your best will never measure up to someone else...Matt with Vera...and I almost feel sorry for her.  But at the same time, she too will always be a part of Adam's life.  I just don't know.  Going to Houston...he asked me to go with him, and I don't have to see her, and I know that he really wants me there- hell, he wanted me there even before we were back together...
As I'm rereading this post, I sound like I'm just kind of psycho babbling, but hopefully I can reread this and make some sense of it in the morning...

Monday, May 10, 2004

So today's my first day back at work in nearly 2 weeks, and this is the first break I've had since 8 this morning.  Gross.  I wish I had the summer break that my lil bro has- no job, just hanging out, going to the beach with friends, a basically being a bum.  I miss those days sometimes. 
I know I sound completely sappy and retardedly head-over-heels lately, but I can't help it.  I have never, ever in my life felt like this. 
Cute, sappy story, for those of you who care about my love life:
When I was in high school, we weren't dating anymore but were still good friends.  One afternoon, shortly before he moved to Texas, we were sitting in my car having one of those endless conversations, and before I left to go home, I gave him my ring- at the time, it was my favorite ring...2 separate rings joined in a celtic knot.  I told him that the rings were like our lives-completely separate but always joined, and that I would always be there for him as a friend.  Time passed, and I kinda forgot about giving him the ring- we would talk off and on throughout the years, and we were both dating other people.  We kept each other up to date on our lives, but it seemed like we were living in 2 different worlds- I was going to school to become a lawyer, he was trying to make things work for his new family.  Yet we always knew where the other the ring I gave him, we were living 2 different lives, but we were always connected.
Last night, I was at his house when he pulled out my ring. It's tarnished with age now, but he's kept it with him all these years.  When he was working on the boats, it and his pocket watch were all he had with him.  He told me that he had dreamed of the day that he would be able to give it back to me, but never thought it would happen.  Little did he know...
So he told me that he was going to have it cleaned and was going to give it back to me for my about making me cry...I can't seem to express in words what it meant to me that he held on to it...
Enough sappiness. 
Birthday in 2 weeks!!  Yay!  Finally legal...about damn time.
Those of you who read my journal, keep me updated on what's going on in your lives...I miss all of my SHC buddies already!

Saturday, May 8, 2004

I am officially resigning my membership to the "Single Girls of Mobile Association."
A few days ago, I wrote about him.  Since then, he's completely stolen my heart. I feel like a new person, and with him I feel like I can do anything.  And the best part about it is that I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that he feels the same way about me.  We've been friends since 8th grade, and it's taken us this long to come full circle. 
Thursday night was our first "official" date (since "dates" in middle school usually involved a lot of talking on the phone and not really going anywhere, except maybe to the park on Saturdays...), and I don't know that I've ever enjoyed myself as much as I did that night.  We had every intention of going to a crawfish boil and having a few drinks, but both decided that we didn't want to ruin the night with alcohol.  We had dinner, then went to buy my mom a birthday present.  We bought a tub of ice cream, then went down to the pier and ate ice cream like 2 little kids.  And I had more fun just "sittin' on the dock of the bay"...
The next morning, we took his little girl to the mall and went shopping...she's 2 1/2, and I don't know who had the most fun in the toy store.  Watching them together was the most amazing experience.  It keeps reminding me of the counrty song, "when tough little boys/ grow up to be dads/ they turn into big babies again..." She's a daddy's girl through and through, and being able to be a part of that was an awesome experience. 
He makes me feel like I can do anything, and my dreams are as important as his.  I know that he would help me accomplish anything, and he would be beside me no matter what I wanted to do.  I've laughed more since last week than I think I ever have, I've smiled more than I ever have, and it's simply amazing.  I don't have to be anyone other than me, I don't have to pretend to be something or someone I'm not, and neither does he.  And most importantly, the most important people in my life: my mom, my brother, Anna, Tereasa, Alisha and Emily--all like him, and like who we are when we're together.  And for me, that's something that's hard to come by.
I have to stop somewhere, and this looks like a good place...

Friday, May 7, 2004

Well, I'm home.  And I have to say, it feels good.  I miss everyone already, but it really doesn't feel like it's over- graduation is Sunday, so I'm still going to see everyone.
I do miss everyone...badly.  I love all of you guys...

Thursday, May 6, 2004

I think a line from  a John Mayer song sums up how I'm feeling:
"Am I living it right?"
Sometimes I just wonder if I'm getting everything I can, squeezing every last drop, out of every experience.  Time seems to be flying lately, and I don't want to miss anything, and at the same time, I want to savor every experience for all that it's worth.  I want to know, in 10...20...50...75 years, that I lived my life to the fullest, that I have no regrets, and that I lived a full and happy life.  A while back, life was kind of passing me by, and I don't want that to be the case.  I want to wake up with a dance in my step and a song in my heart.  I want to enjoy sunsets, roses, late nights with friends, and love and life for all it's worth. 
Life is too short to let it pass you by.  Carpe Diem. 

Wednesday, May 5, 2004

My room looks sad...and empty.  My computer, myself, and my bed are all that's left.

Tuesday, May 4, 2004

Yay!!!  No more finals!!!  And the only paper I still need to go turn in is essentially done!  *huge sigh of relief*
I hate this time of year.  The stress is all but gone (thank god...) but I hate saying good-bye.  I've never been any good at it, and this year more than my other years at Spring Hill are going to be harder to deal with.  I've gotten close to so many people that are graduating, and unlike high school, most people don't stay in Mobile after graduation...if I want to see these people, I have to travel to the 4 corners of the world and back.
As I'm thinking back over this year, it's actually quite amazing how far I have come, as have my friendships and relationships and general outlook on life.  I have to say that I like myself a lot better than I did at this time last year.  To quote my mom, "I've come into my own."  I know who I am, I've (somewhat) figured out what I want to do, and I've finally realized that my dreams are my own, and it's ultimately up to me to acheive them. I know that I don't need anyone else but me, but having friends is always nice. I've learned that staying up all night to finish papers that I knew about 3 weeks in advance sucks, but no matter how hard I try to get them done early, procrastination and everything else always wins.  I've learned that Wal-Mart is it's own brand of stress relief...there is nothing that a trip to Wal-Mart with your friends can't solve.  I've learned that I have a serious shopping problem....I buy more frivolous "shit" than any one person has a right to own.  I've learned that Carebears are addictive.  I've learned that sometimes you just have to have time for yourself.  I've learned that not everyone wants you to have time for yourself.  I've learned that the lofts in Mobile Hall are way too high off the ground when any amount of alcohol has been consumed. I've learned that sisters will be there for you when you need them the most...even the ones you didn't expect to be.  I've learned that not everyone loves the color pink.  I've learned that sometimes boys are mean, and sometimes boys are nice, but your best friends will see you through them all.  I've learned that the TACA girls can overcome anything.  I've learned that filling out a job application for the YMCA is akin to working for the CIA.  I've learned that having a camera is always a good idea.  I've learned that "making movies" in Mobile Hall can get everyone's attention.  I've learned that car alarms and fire alarms only go off during finals, when you're sick, or really need a good night's sleep.  I've learned that being known as a Jersey girl is still fun.  I've learned that being known as a Southern girl is still fun.  I've learned that Sweet Home Alabama (the movie) sums up my life.  I've learned that human bowling on the third floor can be quite entertaining.  I've learned that I can stomach even the most interesting of Juan's smoothies.  I've learned that the best things in life are free.  I've learned that someone is always willing to get Chinese food.  I've learned that Susan will always be a centerfold.  I've learned that Vix will always make me smile.  I've learned that sometimes your friends can see what you don't want to see.  I've learned that I am happy being me.
So much has happened this year that it would take get all of my thoughts written down.  I keep thinking of more to say, and I have to stop somewhere...
I've learned that online journals are a great way to get your feelings across...
Hugs and kisses, and best of luck to everyone still finishing finals.  Happy birthday, Greg! 
And Anna, just because you don't like being mentioned in my journal...I've learned that Anna loves pinwheels, can do ballet in the hallway for hours, needs to do laundry, looks fabulous in blue, and blah, blah, blah...

Monday, May 3, 2004

I had my Brit Lit final, which I was only slightly concerned about.  Until Alex called me.  He had a death in the family, and he had sent Dr. Neal an e-mail asking her if he could take the final at 9 rather than at the scheduled 1 p.m.  In response, she replied:
"I'm sure that the family will understand that your final exams come first.  Besides, even if you took the final at 9, it will take you more than the 2 hours, so you still wouldn't have time to make it to New Orleans for the funeral.  Perhaps you should ask one of your Jesuit friends to put in a special prayer..."
So....we took the final together.  And wanted to kill ourselves together...when everyone in the class walks out of the final near tears and with blank expressions of sheer know it was bad. 
And Mom had her surgery today...she's in a room now, and hopefully will be minus all of the complications of the last few times, but just knowing that she had to have surgery again is not a good feeling.
AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH.....*well-deserved scream...*
Ciao for now.  Gone to visit mom and try to pack my room.