Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Eggs in a basket

One of my favorite movie references of all time involves eggs. 
More specifically, how a person likes his or her eggs cooked.
I had a friend in college.  I loved her dearly (and still do), but it used to drive me batty to watch her and the men that she would date.  If he liked working out, she became a gym freak.  If he liked cars, suddenly she could rattle off statistics about the hottest racers on the market.  If he liked to cook, she was suddenly absorbed in the Cooking Channel. 
I knew that she hated to cook.
But because the man of the hour loved to piddle around the kitchen, she tried (in vain, I might add)  to match up to what she believed that he wanted in a partner.
They broke up after four months.
My friend didn't know how she liked her eggs cooked.  If he liked scrambled, she wanted scrambled.  If he liked over easy, she was an over easy kind of girl.  And if he preferred his in a basket, well…you know the rest.
She didn't even like eggs to begin with.  But he never knew that, because she was trying so hard to impress and be the person that she thought he wanted that she missed the point altogether, being that he had originally liked her for who she was when she was true to herself, and not when she was pretending to be someone that she thought he wanted.
If you can't be yourself, which first and foremost involves knowing and loving yourself, what's the point?  Differences in a relationship are the spice of life, and make for interesting conversation.  Can you imagine how boring life (and relationships) would be if nobody added any variety?
And for the record, I'm over easy, with a side of hash browns.

Monday, February 5, 2007


Valentine's Day is on the brain for a lot of people--I personally choose not to take the holiday seriously, as I believe that I can tell someone I love them any day of the year, and I don't need a corporate-sponsored holiday to make someone feel special.  (and for the record, if 2/14 is the only day out of the year that your significant other makes an effort at romance, maybe you should work on that....)

Day 6...Miss P has a good one.  (Although I'm promised that tomorrow's is going to be a whopper.)  I've had fun writing these blogs over the last several days, and would love to keep it up--my readers are my inspiration, so anytime you want me to write about something, someone, or whatever floats your boat, let me know.  I

Now.  After that little sidebar...
Long distance relationships.  Yay or nay?  Even though I've done them and it lasted for over a year, it wasn't easy. So if you meet a great guy or girl and he or she lives in another state? Do you try to make it work?  Do you walk away?

My oh my.  I sit on the fence on this one.  BIG time.  Can it work?  Absolutely.  Is it going to be easy?  Absolutely not. 

I don't know that it's necessarily based on the distance factor insomuch as that people don't want to take the time and effort to fully develop a relationship these days, and a relationship means having a rock-solid foundation of trust and open communication.  If a couple takes the time to build that foundation, then they can withstand anything, distance included.   Being apart the majority of the time takes a different level of commitment.  Some people would argue that it's less commitment, because you don't spend as much time together.  But in reality, it's as much or more of a commitment than for two people who live in the same town and can spend time together on a regular basis.  You have to trust your partner to go out and be in social settings without you, and trust that the boundaries that you've set with one another will be respected. 
Anyone who knows me for more than 5 minutes knows that I'm a believer in the magic of love, and with that comes the idea that there is one Mr. or Mrs. Right. (ok, ok--i know not everyone buys into that theory, but I do, so leave me alone :-) And who am I to say that I won't meet Mr. Right on a flight to Tokyo?  Or on a cruise across the Atlantic?  Or online?  Or next door?  He may live across the street, across the state, across the country, or across the globe.  But if he truly is the right person for me, then all will work out as it should, and the distance issue will take care of itself.
Is it for everyone?  No.  I don't think some people are willing to take on the unique challenges that a long distance relationship entails.  And some people aren't secure enough about themselves and their own position in a relationship to be able to handle the pressures of being apart.  But I don't think that a person should be written off because of distance.  Taking a chance is what makes life worth living.

Thursday, February 1, 2007

breakin' the rules once i learn the game

Miss P's thought for the day:
{I had a discussion with a guy friend of mine last night about Man Law--the whole elaborate system intrigued me.  Supposedly, there is a system of rules that guys just...know.  This made me wonder what rules we ladies labide by.  What rules am I unknowingly breaking?  For example: No dating your friend's ex without permission...what's the deal?}
If there are imaginary rules, to break them.  Mostly because I consider myself clueless when it comes to "playing the game."  But, seeing as how I was in a sorority once upon a time, and certain rules--albeit unspoken most of the time--governed some of OUR actions, maybe I can expound.  Perhaps not clearly, and certainly not with any authority, but who's counting?
Yeah, the dating of a friend's ex is a tricky area.  My own rule...unless I know for certain that a friend is completely over someone, and for that matter, usually seeing someone else, I steer clear of it.  In my opinion, it's just bad practice.  When you cross that invisible line, you end up making enemies unknowingly, not to mention getting caught in a tangled web. Obviously, if the breakup was a harsh one and your friend is particularly vulnerable, you're only setting yourself up for disaster. 
White shoes after Labor Day.  I know.  It's outdate, and some women say to screw the rule, but it's been ingrained in me since I was old enough to dress myself.  My grandmother would roll over in her grave if she saw me wearing white shoes at Thanksgiving...
I know exactly who to thank for the next one: sitting down while smoking and/or drinking.  And heaven forbid you do both at the same time.  I break this rule all the time, but nevertheless, the etiquette-trained voice inside my head always reminds me that it's not "ladylike."  (Which begs the question: What IS ladylike in this day and age?)
This one pisses me off: Don't talk about your sexual exploits...or, don't kiss and tell. And never reveal how many sexual partners you've had, whether it's 0 or 100.  (I disagree.  In the confines of a relationship, honesty and communication are the only grounds for success.  It depends on the relationship, though.  But I digress.)  Granted, it depends on your personal views here, but this goes back to the last couple of days worth of postings and the double-standard that exists for men versus women. 
Pillowcase openings should always face the same direction.  Enough said.
You can't ask to borrow something if the person you're borrowing it from hasn't gotten to use said item yet.  Generally, I'm referring to clothes and shoes and the like, but I'm stingy about books, too.  If I haven't read it yet, get your hands off :-)
If you're riding in a car with a group of people, and the person who is driving has a significant other, and that particular significant other is riding in said car, that person trumps all calls of "shotgun."  Bastards.
If I take a picture with my camera, and you say, "Oooh! Lemme see it!," you owe me a drink.  And/or a pack of batteries.  (If you carry batteries around with you on a regular basis (and not because you're a camera freak like me)--just as someone who likes to be all extra-prepared, I'd like to meet you and pick your brain.)
I'm having a hell of a hard time coming up with anything.  This topic has given me a severe case of writer's fog. (it's not so much of a 'block" as it is a "haze") I'm going to
go ahead and post this, but I'll probably add more as the day goes on.
Readers...go for it.  Happy Friday!