Hush little baby

On with the show, then.

Why do people give women grief when she says that she doesn't want to have children? 
(there's a long diatribe that my muse of the week followed up this statement with, but for reasons I can't explain, will not copy and paste.  And I'm too lazy to write it out again...)

Touche, Penney.  Touche.  Magnifique.
I once fell into this category.  I once believed that children were adorable, were cute, were a bunch of other choice words, but not for me.  But times change, circumstances change, and my perceptions change. 

Whether you want children or not, your body is wired to bear them. And success, in evolutionary terms, is defined by your ability to produce offspring and raise them to reproductive age.  Throughout history, a woman's place has been to nurture, to bear children, to care for hearth and home.  It was her responsibilty to bear children to carry on the family name, to help with the home, et cetera, et cetera, ad naseaum.  And even though,  by most people's standards, this is an outdated viewpoint, it is still so incredibly ingrained in our society that women who, in a sense, rebel against the norm, are looked at as some sort of freak. 

I think today's culture has shifted to a more selfish universe, one in which children are viewed as a burden rather than a blessing.  Granted, having children slows a person down considerably.  But so much is experienced through the eyes of a child, so much joy and laughter that can only be experienced through being a parent.  And I personally don't believe that any woman can truly and honestly say that she doesn't want children with a concrete and resolute finality.  Women, whether we like it or not, are wired to reproduce.  At some point, the sight of a stroller will make your heart flutter and the sight of a pregnant woman will have you dreaming in pink and blue.  And you realize that you're not so adverse to the idea of having children after all. (I, of course, realize that this was a giant blanket statement ) Whether a woman chooses to act on this is a different question entirely.  But it does beg the question regarding single women looking for sperm donors.  If women could turn off the desire to reproduce, why are these women, most successful and professional, looking to have children without a partner?  The desire to have children is a powerful one.

I don't know that it's so much about giving a woman grief for not wanting to have children as it is a lack of understanding.  Women, especially women who already have children, can't see beyond the pale.  It's a foreign concept, one that some cannot wrap their minds around. 

Each person is entitled to his or her own choices in life, and so long as the choices we make are responsible ones (in dealing with the question of whether or not to have children, you have to question your own level of responsibility) and don't negatively affect others, the decision is ultimately ours to make.